check it out....this is my very special 30 seconds of internet fame! enjoy!

So a report came out today that the US only lost 20,000 jobs in April. And that's supposed to be great news!

Well, for the rest of us who are struggling in this blood for oil, rebate saving recession, I think that is not great news at all. Just last week my sister, who has a masters degree and works for a government funded agency was cut-off from health care benefits, while my friend who works for a large newspaper came home on Monday to tell us that the latest round of layoffs at her company completely wiped out all of the employees with the most tenure (aka: the highest salaries).

So for all of those 20,000 jobs that were lost last month, there is a face of a person who has no where to go, an economy with little new jobs to offer, and more than likely a family to support. And while I know it is the government / press' job to spin the story so that we all don't freak out and make the economy worse, I just can't imagine who can read that 20,000 of their peers have lost their job in a one month time frame and think, "WOW! That's GREAT news!"

I am the type of girl who has no problem sneaking a flask full of vodka into a movie theatre to watch Jackass II or laugh my ass off during Tenacious D and the pick of Destiny, but some movies just take it a little too far. Is it just me, or is the soon-to-be-released "Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay" in really bad taste?

While the US is holding people hostage, torturing them and offering them no chance at a fair and timely trial (the process was once again postponed today by another ill move of the Bush administration) we are going to sit back with a handful of Goobers and laugh at it all?

Well...I, for one, am not ready for this. To me it is comparable to having Ice Cube make another family Road Trip movie where they end up at a Concentration Camp.

So no dice from this movie goer. I will just have to save my hard-earned $10 for the next Judd Aptow movie (I am actually super excited about Pineapple Express).

This past week the Columbian government seized over 7 TONS of mary jane from the revolutionary guerrilla group, The Revolutionary Armed Forces of Colombia.  Now all I'm saying, is that that last thing that you want to take a away from a (terrorist), angry-as-hell, anti-goverment army is a substance that might make them sit in one spot and giggle at each other while playing guitar hero.  I am figuring that we will hear a lot more from FARC in the near future, and not in the "I made special brownies, who wants to share?" kind of way.  So I say, great job Columbia, great job at taking away what little chance you had at passing that all-too-important peace pipe.

It feels as though it is time for a new blog, but what to write about??  Do I write about the air of excitement surrounding the debate last night, or would that just show that I only have one trick up my sleeve?  I heard on progressive talk radio that I am supposed to have other interests besides politics...

Maybe I should write about Serbia.  Does that still count as politics, or can I count that as foreign affairs?  It probably still counts.  

So what do I have left to blog about?  Oh yeah.... the most important news of the day...JLO made babies.  I hear there are 2 of them and that a mere photographed image of them is worth 6 million dollars.  That is more than the cost of a picasso, or a small island in the caribbean.  Makes total sense, right.  

So how's that for other interests talk radio??

So as I mentioned in my previous blog, I am way too excited for the primaries today and thus I have created this....it's a drinking game...feel free to copy and paste it and use it with your friends...

In the priceless words of Jessie Spano, "I am so excited...and I just can't hide it!" and that is why I am sitting at work, wearing my "Barack The Vote" shirt waiting for enough time to go by that I can rush to my Super Tuesday party and indulge in vodka and politics!  And while I watch the second hand tick away, I rock out to Will.i.Am and think about that world that might be...if we all just get out and vote for change.

So this animal was born without any ears or legs. It has the face only its mother can love and is totally undistinguishable as a species. What do you think? And where can I get one?

So the Golden Globes have officially been canceled thus ending my tradition of forcing my friends to come to my house dressed up like nominated movie characters.  Sure, I knew that this year my couch would be crowded with faux-pregger girls pretending to be Ellen Page, but there was a dim hope that just one person would pay a visit to their local costume shop and come dressed as  Cate Blanchett from Elizabeth: The Gloden Age, Johnny Deep from Sweeny Tood or as Ryan Gosling with blow-up doll in tow.  Now I will never know. 

So thank you Foreign Press for the disappointment in my heart and my 12 feet of unused red carpet.

It is 3:15pm pacific time and I am anxiously awaiting the second I get off the clock and can run home, turn on CNN and watch my precious Barack Obama cross the finish line as the democratic presidential nominee from the state of Iowa. I hate the fact that right now there are Iowaians caucusing away while I sit here at work and count the minutes until freedom. Life is so cruel!

Christmas is the most awesomeist time of year.  I get to see all of my extended family, talk way too much about world war dos and eat my weight in mayonnaise-based side dishes.  So why do I always feel so empty inside (excuse the pun) when it's over? 

Is it because my grandpa has to go back to living alone in the desert, or because my parents and dog give me those sad eyes when I leave at the end of the night to go back to my apartment 15 minutes away?  Whatever it is, last night when I made the drive home and turned on the radio to hear Christmas carols playing I got a little teary-eyed and nostalgic for twenty minutes earlier. 

Now I am sitting at work with a pit in my stomach that even yesterday's leftovers can't fill, anxiously awaiting the drink-and-forget holiday of New Years.

the disappointing news keeps aflowing. first someone let joel madden have a baby and now its jamie lynn; our precious jamie lynn. it just makes me sit back and wonder how a girl from a family with such high moral values as the spears' could make such a tawdry mistake. when will hollywood go back to the upstanding morally-taut lifestyle that has been brought to us by the likes of Tom Cruise and John Travolta? what jamie lynn needs to do to get back on moral high-ground is to buy a tuopee and denounce psychiatry. all hail xenu!!!